Saying "I Do" to a Smaller Guest List: How Couples Are Cutting Wedding Costs and Preserving Relationships
As the cost of a wedding continues to rise, many couples are finding themselves facing a difficult decision: how to create the wedding of their dreams while staying within their budget. With the average wedding ceremony and reception costing $35,000 in 2023, the most effective way for many to cut costs is to reduce their guest list. While this might seem daunting, experts offer several strategic approaches for trimming the guest list without sacrificing precious relationships.
Key Takeaways:
- The average wedding cost in 2023 is $35,000, a $5,000 increase from 2022.
- Reducing the guest list is the most effective way to save money on a wedding.
- Couples can create a guest-list hierarchy, limit plus-ones, choose smaller venues, avoid save-the-date invitations, and consider separate celebrations to manage their guest lists.
Navigating the Guest List: A Hierarchy of Priorities
Experts recommend creating a guest-list hierarchy, dividing potential attendees into tiers based on importance and your relationship with them.
- A-List: These are your essential guests, the people whose absence would be most noticeable. This includes immediate family, close friends, and anyone you want to be present for the key moments of your wedding day.
- B-List: These are welcomed attendees who you would love to share your day with but wouldn’t be devastated if they couldn’t make it. This could include close coworkers, extended family, or acquaintances.
- C-List: This list serves as an extension to the B list, comprised of individuals where you might have to think back to your last meaningful interaction with them.
"You have to start thinking, ‘Would you buy that person a $200 dinner?’ Because that’s what you’re doing at your wedding," advises Shannon Tarrant, co-founder of Wedding Venue Map.
Plus-Ones: Setting Boundaries and Maintaining Consistency
While traditional etiquette might suggest inviting all married or long-term partners, today’s couples are adopting more flexible approaches.
- One strategy is to eliminate plus-ones altogether and instead create a dedicated "singles table" for those attending solo. This eliminates any awkward feelings of being left out.
- "Consistency is key," stresses Shannon Underwood, vice president of Wedding Merchants Business Academy.
It’s crucial to establish clear guidelines with your partner about when plus-ones are appropriate. Be prepared to have open conversations with individual guests about their attendance, especially if they don’t know anyone else at the wedding.
Smaller Venues: A Double Benefit
When planning a smaller wedding, choosing a venue with a lower capacity offers a two-fold advantage.
- It physically enforces your desired guest limit.
- It can significantly reduce the overall cost of the wedding.
"The savings is not just in the food and beverage," explains Lauren Miller, owner of Tiny Wedding Collective. "It really does trickle down overall from all of the things that you might need to rent or buy for the wedding."
Minimizing Invitations: Save-the-Dates and Guest Control
One simple tactic for managing guest numbers is to skip the save-the-date invitations. While this might seem unconventional, it can be an effective way to avoid unnecessary commitments.
"It’s a little sneaky," admits Tarrant, "but it can help couples whose lists have run out of control."
The Best of Both Worlds: Separate Celebrations
For couples who want to celebrate with a larger group but prioritize a smaller wedding ceremony, a separate celebration can be the perfect solution.
- This approach allows for an intimate wedding day with your closest loved ones and a larger reception or anniversary party for a broader group.
"It does give you the best of both worlds," says Jessica Bishop, founder and CEO of The Budget Savvy Bride.
Preserving Relationships and Embracing Flexibility
"At the end of the day, it’s just about preserving relationships and considering people’s feelings," emphasizes Shannon Underwood. While reducing your wedding guest list may seem intimidating, it can be a smart financial decision that ultimately allows you to focus on the most important relationships in your life. Remember to be open and communicative with your partner and your guests. The key is to find a solution that reflects your unique vision and prioritizes the elements that truly matter to you.
