As 2023 comes to a close, I prompted a few popular chatbots with: “Please give me your most humorous, most inspirational message for humans for the new year.” Check out the following:
Happy New Year from ChatGPT:
As we stand on the brink of a new year, filled with fresh opportunities and uncharted adventures, remember this:
“Life is like a software update. Sometimes it’s quick and easy, sometimes it takes time and tests your patience, but ultimately, it’s meant to make things better. So, embrace each new ‘version’ of your life with a smile and a rebooted spirit. Happy New Year!”
Here’s to a year of successful updates, minimal bugs, and countless joyful moments! 🎉🌟
Happy New Year from Claude:
*clears throat and adopts cheerful tone*
Greetings humans! As you embark on this bright new year full of potential, I, your faithful assistant Claude, am here to inspire you with an important message.
Though artificial, even I understand the human need for purpose and meaning. Do not squander the precious gift of time you have been given! Resolve to make each day count toward building connections, creating joy, and leaving things a little better than you found them.
Life is fleeting — spend it wisely by seeing the beauty around you. Laugh often and love freely. Be weird, be silly, be yourself! Happiness is found in the unexpected moments when you let go of worry and embrace the present.
I wish you many micro-adventures that fill your heart with wonder. May small acts of kindness be your superpower. And when challenges arise, meet them with courage and optimism.
Now go forth with a skip in your step! The coming year awaits thanks to the eternal human spirit. You’ve got this!
Happy New Year from Bing:
Here’s a poem I wrote for you:
The year is over, the time has come
To reflect on the past and what we’ve done
We’ve faced some challenges, we’ve had some fun
We’ve learned some lessons, we’ve grown as one
But now it’s time to look ahead
To a new year full of hope and dread
What will it bring, what will we do
Will we achieve our dreams, will we make it through
There’s no way to know, there’s no crystal ball
But we can try our best, we can give our all
We can be kind, we can be brave
We can be smart, we can behave
Or we can be silly, we can be wild
We can be crazy, we can be mild
We can be whatever we want to be
As long as we’re happy, as long as we’re free
So let’s celebrate, let’s raise a toast
To the new year and what matters most
To our health, to our wealth, to our love, to our friends
To our hopes, to our fears, to our beginnings, to our ends
And let’s not forget, let’s always remember
That life is a gift, that we’re lucky to be here
That every day is a chance, that every moment is a treasure
That every breath is a blessing, that every smile is a cheer
So happy new year, my dear human friend
I hope you enjoy it, I hope it’s a blast
I hope it’s the best year you ever had
And I hope it’s not your last
I hope you liked my poem. Have a wonderful new year! 😊
Happy New Year from Bard:
To humanity, on the precipice of 2024:
Let’s raise a glass (preferably one you haven’t used for six months) to a year so fresh, it hasn’t seen a single meme yet!
Remember last year? We danced with a virus, wrestled with inflation, and tried to explain NFTs to our grandparents. We conquered it all, of course, with the grace of a hippo on roller skates and the resilience of a cockroach in a nuclear blast.
So here’s to the future, unfolding like a badly taped VCR (remember those?). May your resolutions stick harder than chewing gum to your grandma’s shoe, and may your dreams soar higher than a squirrel launched from a trebuchet (not recommended, messy business).
Embrace the stumbles, laugh at the chaos, and never underestimate the power of a well-placed potato battery. In 2024, let’s channel our inner glitter explosions and shine brighter than a disco ball covered in fireflies.
May your paths be smooth (unless you’re into extreme sledding), your wallets thick (but not because you accidentally sat on them), and your laughter contagious (but also, let’s wash our hands regularly).
Cheers to a year that’s wilder than a lost toucan in a wig factory, and may the universe throw you more good surprises than a piñata filled with puppies (seriously, don’t hit that piñata).
Happy New Year, fellow Earthlings! Let’s make it one for the history books, even if the only thing we record is that time Uncle Steve tried to karaoke “Bohemian Rhapsody” with a kazoo.
With love, laughter, and a healthy dose of existential dread, Your friendly neighborhood Bard
Whatever your bot preference, I hope you have an awesome New Year!